Welcome back to Dunder Mifflin!   This year’s premiere differed from any other due to the glaring and permanent absence of Michael Scott. Upon first hearing that Steve Carrell would not be returning to the seventh (and last) season of The Office, many viewers, myself definitely included, asked how on earth could they do this show without him. Steve Carrell’s Michael Scott was the showrunner, the driving force, the sticky and inappropriate glue that held this office barely together. I am sure many tuned in tonight just to see how the show fared without him. Well, let’s just say he was definitely missed. Although the presence of slimy and reluctantly charming of James Spader was a welcome one, it might take some momentum to replace the energy that Scott filled his office with.

We return to Dunder Mifflin with a new Regional Manager. After a slew of applicants, including Dwight, Daryl, DeAngelo and Robert California, Andy Bernhard won the prized position. Much to Dwight’s chagrin Andy’s statue is the one that will be adjusted every opening sequence. To cope with the loss of his destiny, Dwight has taken up boxing, more karate and twice daily meditation. His first order of business is to get the fools in the office to stop planking, which he accomplishes with spraying fire extinguishers on them and tipping them off tables.

Also new to Dunder Mifflin are Pam and Angela’s unborn children. Angela makes heavy note how much tinier her pregnancy is going, and although Pam is further along, this competition isn’t about facts. They never are. New catchphrases are coined (Stanley’s constant injection of “Shove it up your butt!”) , and the excitement shows in the office much like coming back from summer vacation. However, the most prevalent  addition is Robert California. He was Jo’s first choice for the Regional Manager position, yet upon arriving to his first day of work he takes one look at the Scranton branch, turns around to Florida and somehow convinces Jo to give up her job, thus becoming CEO. How he does this is answered by one glance from Mr. California. He’s the type of person who makes you feel hot and clammy with nerves yet still gives you chills. He commands the room he is in and as he circulates the office on one of his classic “weird walks” one simultaneously hopes he stops for a quick chat and also prays he walks right by you.

On one of his walks he leaves his notebook up at reception. Erin gets the attention of Pam who then gets the attention of Jim, and the three of them try to make sense of the page that was left open. A list. Half the employees on the right, the other on the left. What could it mean! Pam photocopies the page and gives it to Andy, who wisely says “I want nothing to do with this.” That is, until he realizes he may not be on the “right” side. He approaches the office with the list and begrudgingly brings it up with California. He first dismisses it as doodles, but Andy notices him “doodle” his (Andy’s) name from one side to the other. Shortly after he invites everyone on the left side of the list out to lunch; Jim, Dwight, Toby, Angela, Kevin, Oscar, and Phyllis. Needless to say, this would never happen with Michael Scott around…

The remaining group orders pizza and speculates as to what is going on, although it is quite clear to them. At lunch Robert California admits that his lunch group are the winners leaving everyone else a loser. Perpetually panicked Toby leaves the lunch table, under the weight of California’s intense and brooding stare. Jim texts Pam that this lunch is indeed weird, but he’ll explain later; Kevin texts “Suck it, Losers”. Well then, I guess that settles it for the folks back at the office. When the “winners” return to the office, gloating and somehow armed with water guns, there is tangible animosity between the two sides of the list. Andy begins to walk in to California’s office, and Erin kindly tries to stop him. (I still hope those crazy kids make it work!) Robert California confronts Andy, and without much hesitation, in front of everyone, reveals the true nature behind the list. He explains that he hopes the winners can prove him right, and that the losers will prove him wrong. What a 80′s villain thing to say! God, I love that guy. He got me under his spell.

With a truly authoritative and professional manner, Andy goes on to explain why each of the losers will prove him wrong; Stanley’s top salesmanship, Pam’s creativity, Erin’s loyalty. California is not convinced, but that was not who needed the convincing. Andy made a bold move and a protective statement about his new branch. With Michael Scott, his employees were his family, and with Andy we see some fair levelheadedness and professional charm. Michael’s desk will be hard to fill, but Andy has to start somewhere, and sticking up for his branch and his friends is a great way to do it.