Jason Farol’s up next with my girl Kelly. He came in last on last week’s show, and Kelly believes the tonic is swagger, and Jason… seems to be the least swaggeriffic person on the planet. They sing “Whenever You Call” by Mariah Carey and Brian McKnight, and Jason’s all smiles. He’s more engaging than others on this show, but whenever Kelly’s onstage, no one else matters. Poor amateurs. Whatever. Some people should just not be famous! John Legend asks Jason to open up to the audience and not just connect with Kelly, Robin concurs with him, and Nettles sees growth but suggests that he moves his torso around more. Had Marvin Gaye been alive, I’m sure he would’ve said the same.
GREASE! J Rome and J Netts sing “You’re the One that I Want” – hell YES. Background dancers! Lights! Leather pants! Snapping! If the judges thought Nettles’s last choice was too Broadway, they’re going to eat her alive for this one. Whatevs, they’re totes jeal. I LOVE IT, and they get a standing ovation from the studio audience. Quddus asks J Rome whether his polished performances will help or hurt him, and J Rome gives the obligatory “I’m-just-so-proud-of-my-fellow-contestants” response that will win him hearts all over the nation. Kelly admits that J Rome has the swagger Jason was missing. John Legend isn’t sure it was the best/most-challenging song choice, but he also concurs that J Rome is a performer. Thicke-y Thicke wasn’t swept off of his feet but loved it anyway. J Rome ties with Meleana for first, which isn’t a huge surprise. I’m beginning to get a bit sleepy. Not a good sign for Duets.
The Thickeness wants to bring out Alexis’s charisma, and Alexis’s permanently salty glare doesn’t seem to want to budge. Their rendition of “You’re All I Need to Get By” starts off well, but that might just be because the song is unshakably amazing. This girl is sexy, but she barely even looks at Robin during the performance. Damp squib, this one, but she seems to think she’s now qualified to give Quddus Swag lessons. Nettles liked it, Legend tells her to hold the microphone closer to her mouth, and Kelly makes me love her even more by giving this girl the truth. She calls the performance “disconnected” and gets booed – well, Alexis ends up in sixth place, so go play in traffic, studio audience!
First ever elimination is next week, and I’ve stopped caring. Can we just boot the amateurs and let the four artists take the stage for 6 weeks?