Dominic Monaghan knows what it’s like to feel lost.
The actor opened up about his “devastating” split with former “Lost” co-star, Evangeline Lilly, in his most candid interview yet about the breakup.
“I think I’ve only really got my heart broken once in my life,” the actor said of his relationship with Lilly, during an appearance on Anna Faris’ podcast, “Unqualified,” in an episode published Wednesday.
“I don’t really know how she would explain the narrative, but from my point of view, it was probably the first time in my life that I was all in,” the “Lord of the Rings” actor said, adding that the two were “exploring kids and marriage” during their relationship, which took place in the early aughts.
Monaghan explained that Lilly’s alleged infidelity and his issues with substances likely contributed to their breakup. HuffPost reached out to a representative for Lilly for comment.
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“I had such an extraordinary amount of growing to do in terms of handling my substances and handling my choices,” he said, adding that Lilly was better at moderation. “I think if you are drinking often, probably your behavior, and your choices and your mood is up for debate.”
Because of his behavior, Monaghan thinks it might’ve pushed Lilly to be unfaithful during the relationship. He previously tweeted about the claim, writing “I don’t date cheaters” in 2013.
“I think she was kind of looking around to see what else was an option,“ he said. “And, unfortunately, there was a little bit of a crossover which was pretty upsetting for me and it kind of exploded in my face in an awful way.”
Monaghan said that not only was it a very public breakup, but someone else had to inform him that Lilly was seeing another person.
“I had to be told by a third party like, ‘You do realize that she’s with this guy,’ when we were together. And I was like, ‘Wait, what?’” Monaghan said, adding that the person was just trying to help when they realized he didn’t have all the facts.
“I mean, to say I was devastated was an understatement,” the “Radioflash” actor shared, adding that he had a turning point a few months after the breakup when he woke up, surrounded by pills on his kitchen floor.
“I looked at this mess in front of me and thought ‘that could’ve been it.’ You could’ve accidentally taken the wrong cocktail of stuff mixed with alcohol, mixed with where your heads at, and that could have been it,” he continued. “You’re not gonna die over this ― like, of course, it’s sad and you’re devastated about it. But you’re not gonna die.”
Lilly was married to former ice hockey player, Murray Hone, from 2003 to 2004, and shares two children with her longtime partner, Norman Kali.
Monaghan told Faris that he is still very hopeful when it comes to love, adding it’s “the No. 1 thing that I’m the most positive about in my life.”