Amy Robach Says She Spirals When T.J. Holmes Does This 1 Thing After Arguments

Former “GMA3” co-hosts Amy Robach and T.J. Holmes are opening up about how they handle conflict in their relationship.

In Tuesday’s episode of their iHeartMedia podcast, “Amy and T.J.,” Robach said that Holmes tends to “check out” after some of their arguments and that that causes her to “spiral.”

“Honestly, I would rather have him yell at me than freeze me out for two days… I spiral,” she said. “I don’t know what to say, what to do, what he thinks.”

Earlier in the podcast episode, Holmes had admitted to the show’s guest, psychologist Jeffrey Gardere, that he occasionally acts distant for a day or two after an argument with Robach.

“I am really, really bad about this,” he said. “I don’t scream, I don’t yell, I don’t name-call, I don’t get aggressive — nothing, but I will check out,” he said, adding, “I have to work through it.”

He continued, “I’m trying to get better about doing it quicker.”

Robach later explained that the couple will often use the phrase “Dan Steely,” a “safe phrase” they created to say to each other when one of them is about to say something in an argument that will send the other person “off the rails.”

The phrase was created after Holmes once accidentally mixed up the name of the rock band Steely Dan, they both explained.

Holmes said that he doesn’t completely “go away” during the times he checks out after an argument with Robach but that he’s not his usual “warm” and “loving” self.

Robach then chimed in that it’s “so awful” when Holmes is checked out.

T.J. Holmes and Amy Robach photographed together at KIIS FM's iHeartRadio Jingle Ball 2023 on Dec. 1, 2023, in Inglewood, California.
T.J. Holmes and Amy Robach photographed together at KIIS FM’s iHeartRadio Jingle Ball 2023 on Dec. 1, 2023, in Inglewood, California.

Steve Granitz via Getty Images

The former “GMA3” co-hosts made their first public statement about their relationship earlier this month, one year after they became the subjects of a media frenzy when news of their romantic relationship was made public.

The Daily Mail had published photographs of the two having drinks and staying at a cottage in upstate New York in November 2022. They were both married to other people when their involvement was revealed publicly.

A spokesperson for ABC News announced in January 2023 that the two would be leaving the network after they were taken off the air the month prior.

Holmes and Robach both insisted in the premiere episode of their podcast that they were both in the middle of divorcing their then-spouses when they were photographed out and about together.

During last week’s episode of “Amy and T.J.,” the former “GMA3″ colleagues discussed whether they have plans to get married.

“It’s under consideration,” Robach said, adding, “We did not enter this relationship for fun or for ‘Let’s see what happens.’ We entered this relationship because we intended on spending our lives together.”

Holmes said that he wants to marry Robach partly due to the fact that he wants a new way of introducing her.

“I want to marry you because you are 50 and I’m 46, and I am very sick of introducing you — a 50-year-old woman — ‘this is my girlfriend,’” he said. “That just sounds stupid.”